Limericks: A Shout to My Fellow Papists

"A limerick is a five-line poem with a strict form, originally popularized in English by Edward Lear. Limericks are frequently witty or humorous, and sometimes obscene with humorous intent."

According to wikipedia these two are anonymous, but I think worth reiteration:

The limerick packs laughs anatomical

Into space that is quite economical,

But the good ones I've seen

So seldom are clean,

And the clean ones so seldom are comical.

There once was a lady from Bude

Who went swimming one day in the lake.

A man in a punt

Stuck his pole in the water

And said "You can't swim here -- it's private.

Ha! Well, anyway, here are two of my own that you might enjoy unless you happen to have given birth to me:

There once was an Ellensburg man
Whose buttcheeks were glued to the can.
It stunk to high heaven
By six or day seven.
"Could someone just turn on the fan?!"

And:

I once met a pimp with three toes
Who took tricks for a trio of ho's.
They couldn't find Johns
to pay for tampons
Now his digits hold back heavy flows.

Gross. Bob Sagat would be proud. Proust less so mayhap. But what can you expect for a Friday six beers deep.

Sorry Mom